Father's Day Weekend

This weekend we celebrated Lee and the father that he is to our family.  I feel bad his birthday just kind of got passed over with the combination of us being at convention, me not having a car and failing to plan to ahead, and our kids being gone.  So this weekend, the younger girls and I tried to make him feel loved:)

Last night, we ended it with sharing what we love about him (this is a tradition for the birthday person each year).  Tori even participated over Facetime.  But as our younger two began to share, there were many tears.  Tears of gratefulness that they have a godly father.  Realization that God rescued them from a possible ungodly father to give them someone so much better.  Someone who protects them and loves them as his own.  It was a special moment in time.  In the midst of the chaos of life, sometimes it is good to sit down.  Slow down.  Remember the bigger picture.

This is also the word the Lord gave me at church that morning.  Worship was amazing yesterday.  Right before church, I read a comment from a childhood friend about my beautiful family in the video I had made Lee.  The Lord spoke very clearly to me.  "You are living your dream."  " I have given you what you prayed for."  Its so true.  I prayed for a big family.  I prayed for birth children and adopted children.  I prayed to homeschool those kids and be a full time mom.  But in the chaos of life, it is sometimes easy to lose perspective.  With the endless chores that there sometimes are.  With the drama that happens in a house full of girls....it can sometimes be really easy to forget.  Forget that this is what I asked the Lord for.  And He gave me my big family.  My beautiful children.  He allowed me in this season to be home with them.  Every Day.  To be the one who pours into them.

And you know that music always speaks to me the loudest.  My new song that I can't get enough of is Touch the Sky by Hillsong.  The words are just so powerful to me.  

My heart beating, my soul breathing
I found my life when I laid it down
Upward falling, spirit soaring
I touch the sky when my knees hit the ground

Our lives are really meaningless unless we are doing what God has called us to.  

Its when we truly lay our lives down, that God can use us.

If we want to touch heaven, we have to be on our knees....

Touch The Sky (lyric video) - Hillsong UNITED

Back to Normal

Today I woke up early and have been busy so far...  Finally feeling back to normal.

Running errands, cooking, cleaning, getting things ready for a Nursery Meeting on Saturday.  Yesterday, we picked up the girls schoolwork for next year.  So we got that all organized.  I truly have teacher blood because I always get excited about what the girls will learn next year.  I love getting it all organized and ready to go.  But am also thankful it is summer break...

I am sweating, but getting more used to it.  Once again, thankful for the tub Lee had put in a few years ago.  Thankful that nighttime usually brings cooler temps.  And thankful to be back in my own home.  Because this is my normal:)

I really never followed up about Erika.  She is doing fine.  Her ticks lessened tremendously when we went to the states.  Unfortunately, they increased once we got home to Belize.  But I don't feel stressed or worried anymore.  The doctor we took her to told us that 1 in 10 people have a tick sometime in their life.  She said it is not dangerous or hurting Erika.  And that Erika will probably outgrow them as she moves into puberty.  She also said it tends to happen in kids that are really smart...and that Erika is.  She is 8 years old and going into 5th grade next year.  After the doctor visit, I felt much more peaceful.  And they don't seem to bother Erika anymore.  We continue to pray for God to heal her, but trust she is okay if they continue.

Tonight we have Kailey and Erika's ballet recital.  I am really excited.  They have worked hard.  The whole dance is an act of worship unto the Lord.  I love that they are getting this opportunity.  They even got to be on live TV on Tuesday talking about it.  I am busy making brownies for the bake sale tonight and I am sure we will be practicing one last time in the living room this afternoon.  And of course, we have to get their make-up and buns just perfect.  All on top of getting the house clean for Net tonight...but we won't be here.

Yes, I am feeling back to normal.  In my life.  I am no longer adjusting to living in Belize.  It is what I know now.   I am comfortable making dinner for my family, cleaning up after them:), and loving the people of the nation of Belize.

Together

Finally, I am able to put up a photo with all of our children.  I am so thankful to Alice for taking all of these beautiful pictures.  I can't wait to frame them and display them in our home.

 I have been back to Belize for a few days and I am still finding it take me a bit to get adjusted back to life here.  I have a list of things that need to be done, but I find my energy is gone so quickly here.  It is actually not too hot right now and we had a wonderful rainstorm last night.  But it is just different here.

One of the best parts of our trip home was that I had all my children together, under one roof.  The time was way too busy and went by way too fast. I have to come back to Belize to get my rest. But I am thankful to all who poured into us.  People who gave us money to do things with our kids, took us to eat, cooked for us, housed us.  It was all such a blessing.

Now I come back to get busy again at LifeNet.  We will be starting a Nursery at the end of the month, so I am busy getting everything ready.  I will train our volunteers on Saturday.  This is such an unknown thing in Belize.  I am praying that the Lord uses this as a ministry to our parents of small children.

Josh and Tori are still in the states, so I only have my youngest two.  The house is definitely a bit quieter.  I miss them and am thankful for facebook and facetime.

I just got a call and Kailey and Erika are about to go on TV to talk about the Ballet Recital they have Thursday.  So lots of excitement in the air.

What does family look like?

When all of this happened with Erika about a month ago, all I wanted was to go home and be with my family.  I am one of those people who is blessed with an amazing extended family.  But God began to show me something.  That He has given me quite a family here in Belize.  Of course, I still want to go home and see my biological family, but He has been showing me something very powerful.  As we began to share what was going on with Erika, one of my friends messaged me and shared how she has wept over this and has been praying and fasting for her.  When we shared with our leaders (Erika was in another room), one of the men that has been with us since the beginning, prayed such a passionate prayer over Erika's life, filled with such love.  Afterwards, his wife came and shared a vision of Erika sitting on Jesus' lap just laughing and having a great time.  And one of my friends who teaches Ballet, chose Erika for a special part, before I talked to her. She felt the Lord wanted her to do the part because of the meaning of this song:

HE WANTS IT ALL (Watch in Separate Post)

When I downloaded the song and Erika heard it, she just began to dance to the Lord in our living room.  Many words have been spoken that seem to say that the Lord is going to use this experience to draw her into a more intimate relationship with Him.  I have played it over and over, quite often crying.  I feel this journey has been hardest on me.  I am the one she runs to, hides her head in, when she is struggling.  Yet, I also feel God is healing her.  We had a very powerful service a few weeks ago and she went forward first, without me.  I later joined her when there was a call to healing.  But no matter what happens, the Lord has given me peace that He loves Erika more than I do.  His plans for her are bigger than I could ever understand.  And my job is just to love her and support her through her journey.

He Wants It All by Forever Jones

Battle

This morning as I was washing the breakfast dishes and cutting pineapples for lunch, my thoughts were swirling.  I am overwhelmed with excitement of going on a little break.  As I sat there, I thought, "This is how soldiers must feel when they go on leave..."  Going home is never the same.  You are different.  The battles you have fought are hard for others to understand.  But this is the one thing that I kept thinking...is how thankful I am for the enormous support system that awaits us.  I have been overwhelmed with messages on facebook and emails of people back home who are agreeing in prayer with us.  Who literally Hold Us Up.

The battle always seems to get more intense when we are about to receive a rest.  Every single time.  It has been a consistent issue as we have tried to take short overnight times away here or longer stay in the states.  But this I know is also true, that the Lord abundantly blesses us and refreshes and refills us to continue.  Every year, I go home to Texas very weary...yet, by the end of the trip, I am ready to return to what God has us here for.

My prayer on this trip is that my nucluer family would bond deeply.  We have never lived as just us, Lee, Robyn, Josh, Tori, Kailey and Erika....  Even on this trip, we will not be totally alone most of the time.  But Josh is taking this time off from work and I am praying that we have some real connected family, fun times, loving times.  My prayer is also that we see a healing for Erika.  But knowing sometimes, we must walk out the journey as well, I am praying for grace and wisdom for Lee and I as parents and for her siblings as well.  I have really been proud so far of how her brother (through facetime) and sisters have been with her.  And I am thankful for the support system we have here in Belize who all love Erika deeply.  And one other prayer is that LifeNet would thrive while we are gone.  Because ultimately, our prayer is to release this church plant into the hands of Belizeans.  So, I pray that even with us gone, that LifeNet would grow spiritually and numerically.

We are in our last weeks of school.  There is excitement in the air as the girls are slowing finishing up subjects.  We are all so ready for a little break...