They Jumped the Fence

I never thought I'd want a barbed wire fence.  I mean, its ugly, uninviting, scary.  But, today the team will install an ugly, hopefully scary deterrent to would be "fence-jumpers."  I mean, they even left the bench from the neighbors yard, right up against our fence, leaving evidence of how exactly they got in.

Living in a country where unemployment is extremely high, leads to a lot of desperation.  I have known people to do things...out of means of survival.  We want to be a church, a family that helps.  But we don't want to be taken from.  We don't want to feel that if we leave the house, we are being watched so that someone can jump our fence and steal from us.  And it is not the stuff they stole, rather our sense of security.

I truly believe I am not walking in a sense of fear.  Just caution.

So, today, we build a barbed wire fence on the back of our property.  If someone comes in, it will be by because they were invited in...not by jumping over...

He shall cover you with His feathers,
And under His wings you shall take refuge;
His truth shall be your shield and buckler.
 You shall not be afraid of the terror by night,
Nor of the arrow that flies by day,
 Nor of the pestilence that walks in darkness,
Nor of the destruction that lays waste at noonday.

Psalm 91:4-6

This Place

This weekend has been really amazing.  We have a team here and have been busy.  There are 30 people..and that is just a huge team for us.  And some are here to do Child Evangelism, others are building...so they are in different places each day.

We did our fourth Life Advance this weekend.  I have never taught at the Life Advance.  I have never really stood in front to do anything of that sort...all by myself...before.  Lee was desperate and needed a teacher and asked me.  And then went and got the folder so I could study:)

So, I found myself with two days to prepare to teach on Strongholds and Curses.  The material I actually really knew...I have been to about 20 Life Advances in the past 12 years.  But as I prepared, I also began to see that I still really struggle with fear.  Fear of rejection or saying something wrong.  Fear of losing it in front of a room of people.  And so Saturday was actually a healing for me.  A true breakthrough.  Those who really know me how far out of my comfort zone it was.  But Lee said he was teary eyed as he saw me speak with confidence and strength.  Strength that truly only could come from the Lord.  Because I, myself, am weak.

Living on the Mission Field has pushed me out of my comfort zone a hundred times over.  I have this greater confidence when I minister than I ever did before.  I speak to the girls at the children's home and have led several groups through the Life Manual.  All things that are new and fresh here in Belize.

The other thing is that I find myself in this place of Belize really becoming more and more like home to me.  Don't get me wrong.  I so much miss my family and friends in the states.  I miss so many things about living in the states.  I miss that my boy will be going to the states for college and I will be far away.  But I also find that I am so comfortable in Belize now.  I know so many people when I go anywhere.  I remember when we first came here three years ago, we didn't know anyone...

Also, I am so in love with our church body.  The Life Advance is a time where I get to see people we have poured and poured into, come to a place of greater freedom than they have ever known before.  As we were in worship this morning...powerful worship, I thought, "Wow, this is just fun..."  The past fall was so rough on us...we were under such attack.  But now, we are walking in the fruit and the joy...

Sunday morning there was such incredible ministry.  The place was busting full.  Tori and several others had to stand through the entire service because there were no seats left...even when all the children left for children's church.  We saw 12 people give their hearts to Christ...many of those we know and are excited they are finally making the decision.  It is just exciting.

One other thing that Lee said that was very powerful to me...I spoke with confidence on Saturday to my spiritual children.  It wasn't just a room of people I was talking to, rather my kids, that I want to see set free from strongholds in their lives.  So I spoke with confidence, almost as if I was just talking to them one on one.  It was just a super cool weekend.

Sometimes Moms just cry...

My husband and kids gave me the most special Valentine's gift.  A carafe filled with notes from all them and candy and lotions...Lee couldn't wait to give it to me, so I got it a day early.  I will actually read the notes tomorrow, but just thanked Lee for being so creative and thoughtful...and it made me cry.

Women cry.  It is just the way we are.  It doesn't mean something is wrong, necessarily...it is just how God made us.  Sometimes tears are actually very healing.

I remember taking countless pregnancy tests...that were false...and the tears that would so quickly come after another month of disappointment.  But, even when the test FINALLY came back positive, there were tears too...tears of joy that I was finally going to begin the journey I had waited my whole life to begin.

Other times I have cried...when my baby got his first shots, and the next and the next.  When I was so tired from sleepless nights and learning to be a new mom, and just was so tired.....  I cried the first time that little boy laughed...really laughed...right from his belly.  And on and on.  I am the mom that could barely hold it together through my kids' awards ceremonies, or if they performed at church or school.  Tears of joy and pride.

These days there are a lot of tears too.  That the journey of one of my children begins of life on his own.  I always dreaded this time in our life...but never realized how much he would really be on his own...with us so far away.  And each month that passes draws us closer to that time.  It feels as if life is speeding up, when I wish it could just pause for a while...

I feel sort of like I did all those years ago, when everyone else was getting pregnant...and I could not.  I felt all alone...that no one else could possibly understand how I was feeling.  That was not and is not true...but that is just how it feels.

Recently, a fellow missionary friend's daughter got married.  He has older children in the states who were unable to make the wedding.  He said...it is just some of the sacrifices of a missionary...that no

one else understands.

So pray for me...pray for Josh.  Pray for an amazing roommate, that he will truly embrace the church life and find a family there.  I will be very busy when Josh is gone.  But I will never stop wondering if he is doing okay...well, I guess that is how we make it...our moms never stop praying for us once we leave the house...maybe it even increases:)  And sometimes the tears of those mamas is what touches Jesus the most:)

LifeNet Groundbreaking

Yesterday, something very powerful in the Spiritual Realm happened.  LifeNet broke ground and claimed stake in Belmopan, Belize, for Jesus.  It is all for Jesus.  It the reason we take our next breath...to bring glory to Him.  It is the reason that 220 people gathered under a tent, ankle deep in mud, in horrible rainy weather yesterday.  To claim stake of some property that will be a lighthouse to the darkness all around.

There are 20,000 people, just in Belmopan, not the outlying little villages.  Only 5,000 of those people claim to be churched.  The harvest field is wide open.  And LifeNet now begins the process of building our own building, to be a lighthouse to the community, to the nation.

So much planning went into yesterday.  Tent rental, chair and table rental, food, bbqs, workers.  So much work.  And then Sunday morning at 2 am, it began to rain.  We did not need it to rain.  I woke up praying, asking God to please just let it pass.  And it did, but it came back before six and rained steady until church began at 10:30.  I just spoke to my parents and found out their church was praying at 10:30.  God is great like that:)

We had several photographers to capture the event.  We had one man who is a politician come.  Two families from the states, that have been supportive to LifeNet...and lots of amazing people from LifeNet.  We had 220 people.  I am confident we would have had near 300 had the rain not come...

The rain absolutely affected our attendance.  At one point, I was not sure I really wanted to go either:/  When I pulled up and saw all the MUD...I was like, um, no.  But, as I got out and began to see all the people of LifeNet who had gotten there before me, setting up, grilling, etc, my heart was so overwhelmed with love for this body we pastor.  Yesterday was all about the groundbreaking of the new property, but it felt a lot like Pastor's Appreciation.  As our National Leader, Pastor Caleb shared, as our Council shared...all thanking our family for what we have done these past three years.  It is hard to believe three years ago (and a week), we held "church" in our hotel room...as a family...praying for how  God would use us here in Belmopan, where we only knew one couple.  But God's plans are big.  He wants us to step out into what He calls us to.  And He uses us to get what needs to get done.

You can see more pics on Facebook...but here are some favorites that catch our special day...

Smart to wear boots...a few of the kids were wearing them too...I wish I had thought that for Erika:)

Yummy Shish Ka Bobs grilling.  The ladies in Maya Mopan made flour tortillas, that we wrapped around and wrapped in foil...perfect, easy to pass out, amazingly delicious meal!!!

Everyone enjoyed our very lively worship, with a Carribbean Flair...

Yesterday was just FUN!!!

Pastor Caleb Ortega, our National Leader, shared...

The Church Council each shared...

Telling the story of our family being called to Belize.

Anointing and praying over the land (corner of the new building) with oil...

 

Enjoying the yummy meal after service...everyone loved them!!!

 

And for those who have not seen yet, this is what we project the future building to look like.  Hopefully a modern looking all purpose facility, with a preschool, and able to be used for community and government events.

Time Away...short, but sweet

Sometimes you just need to get away.  Homeschooling, being a Pastor (and wife), being a parent...it just never seems to shut off.  There are always demands, always one more thing you need to do.  Your marriage can get lost in the "to do" lists.

Back in the summer, when our friends, Tom and Francine, came, we were blessed to get away for a night.  And it was glorious.  But life has just been busy.  And being the helicopter mom that I am, it is hard for me to leave my kids alone.

But I knew we needed a get away.  Just the two of us.  But I didn't even say it.  Lee just mentioned a couple weeks ago, that he had set aside a day for us to go...where would I like to go.  I wanted to stay in Belmopan...just in case.  But the selection is limited...for a couple getaway type thing.  Long story, but we ended up contacting the owners of a beautiful place where we often do baptisms.  And they blessed us with a complimentary night.  And it was a blessing.  You see, it is on the edge of town, but as you drive back, it truly feels like you are getting away.

We were there for less than twenty-four hours, with a few check ins with the kids via facebook chat...  But it was incredibly refreshing and relaxing.  And just what we needed.

I am so thankful for how God blesses us when we need it most.

But, then, you know, it was back to real life when we got home:)  Parents, make sure you get those times away with just your spouse...even if it local...it will do wonders...just to get away from everything.